


A Minor Character in Their Saga

by sachspanner



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Community: love bingo, Gen, John Watson's Blog, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-03
Updated: 2013-08-03
Packaged: 2017-12-22 07:47:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/910685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sachspanner/pseuds/sachspanner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Six months after the death of Sherlock, John is ready to start blogging again. Despite everything, he refuses to deny Sherlock's genius, instead discussing the mutual appreciation and sinister attraction which led him to his downfall.</p><p>Not slash, too John-centric for that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Six Months

**Author's Note:**

> Written for LJ's love bingo comm, under the prompt "Mutual Love".

_From the personal blog of Dr. John H. Watson_

**15th December**

It’s now six months since Sherlock Holmes, my best friend, died.

Six months ago, I wasn’t fit to tell my side of the story, Sherlock’s side of the story, but now I have to try. This blog started off as a way for me to keep my mind off my thoughts about Afghanistan; thinking about Sherlock dying has been more than enough recently to occupy me.

I like to think that I’m better now, that I’m over the worst of it. For those of you who don’t know, I was there when he died, and I heard what must have been his last words before, the coroner ruled, he committed suicide. I saw him jump, saw him fall, saw his bloodied body on the pavement. I played it over and over in my mind, wanting him to be brilliant, wanting him to have gotten away somehow.

I never realised I was forcing myself to watch my friend die time after time, blaming myself every time. I’m past that now. Sherlock Holmes is dead; I was at his funeral.

So now I’m going to tell you, finally, about what really happened between Sherlock and Moriarty. It’s up to you if you believe me- God knows hardly anybody does. But I wouldn’t be Sherlock’s friend if I didn’t make sure the truth was there for everyone to read.

Firstly, he wasn’t a liar. His name was Sherlock Holmes. It doesn’t help my case that I can’t back that up with the details of any family members, but Sherlock isn’t related to anyone as far as I’m aware- at least nobody who I can legally mention the existence of. 

The moment I met him, he knew my entire backstory. In theory, Mike could have told him everything, and if you didn’t know Mike you could well believe that. Also, unless Mike is as brilliant as Sherlock supposedly pretended to be, he couldn’t have known that my limp was psychosomatic. After all, I didn’t.

In the weeks after his death, the media portrayed Sherlock as an attention-seeker who solved crimes that didn’t exist just to make people love him. In reality, he was brilliant but flawed, choosing to solve only the crimes that kept him entertained.

This was his downfall, as it let in the one man who could destroy him: Moriarty.

When the police went to examine the roof, they found Moriarty’s body. The media reported it as a tiny footnote to the Sherlock story- that “Richard Brook” also appeared to have taken his own life within minutes of Sherlock.

I do not know if Moriarty murdered Richard Brook, if the man never existed at all, or if that had been the real name of the man we had known as Moriarty all that time. Either way, the man who died on that rooftop was who Sherlock and I said he was- a criminal mastermind with –almost- all the brilliance of Sherlock.

The first time I met Moriarty, and at this point I really don’t care if you believe me or not, he strapped me into an explosive vest and gave me an earpiece. He lured Sherlock to an abandoned swimming pool and instructed me to repeat his words exactly, so that Sherlock would think I was his nemesis.

That was the sort of man Moriarty was. To him, I was just Sherlock’s pet, and Moriarty just wanted to see the look on his face when he thought he’d been undone by someone so insignificant.

Sherlock had looked at me then with surprise, and then, just for a moment, I got to see what he really thought of Moriarty. Admiration. In some ways, I think it went deeper than that, and perhaps that’s the real reason they both wound up killing themselves.

I would say that I was probably closest to Sherlock, but there were some things, particularly when he was excited, that I hardly knew anything about. It was private, between him and Moriarty. I don’t know whose idea it was to meet on that rooftop, for them both to die, but they must have known it was coming. They were like chess grandmasters in that respect. They knew where the game was going long before anyone else.

Much as they hated each other, it was clear to me, as a minor character in their saga, that there was no other person they considered worth their while. Moriarty didn’t understand Sherlock’s reluctance to make money, to take what he wanted. They both had expensive tastes, but something held Sherlock back from indulging as much as Moriarty did.

I wouldn’t say he was a good man. But he was the best man I have ever known.

There are some people who pity me, who think that for Sherlock I was just a credulous moron who provided the believability he needed, not to mention an audience. They theorise that I was scarred by Afghanistan, and that Sherlock’s fantasy world gave me the escape I needed. The fact that I ended up back in therapy after Sherlock’s death has done nothing to disprove their ideas.

There are some who, like me, still believe in Sherlock Holmes, who knew him or were helped by him, who saw at first hand what he could do. I won’t mention their names here; standing up for Sherlock has not made me popular, and I would hate to put those people through what I have gone through.

At work, time off to grieve turned to an open-ended sabbatical, one which it was made clear I was not considered fit to come back from. When I tried to find another job, I found that my association with Sherlock tended to raise questions at interview.

There are so many reasons why I might wish I had never met Sherlock Holmes. Except I don’t. I miss him every day. When I came back from Afghanistan, I was hardly alive. He gave me so much.

I will never tell anyone what Sherlock told me over the ‘phone that day. So many people told me to take this blog down, that Sherlock was gone and that I’d be better off distancing myself.

But do you have any idea what it is like to lose your best friend, not just see him die, but know that nobody thinks that he ever existed? I hate Moriarty so much. I hate him because he’s dead, and because he doesn’t care that I hate him.

He never cared what I thought. He only ever looked at Sherlock.

P.S. I disabled comments on my last post because I didn’t want to hear what people were saying about me, about Sherlock. Now, I’ve heard it all before: do your worst.


	2. 15 Comments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Of minor interest to anyone who read the last chapter. The followers of John's blog discuss his latest post: some with pity, others with anger, some expressing disgust.
> 
> Then one expresses complete faith in him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for LJ's Love Bingo comm, under the prompt "Second Chance".

Oh, John…  
 **Mrs Hudson** , 15 December, 11:02

He was a freak. Everyone’s better off him not being around.  
 **Sally Donovan** , 15 December, 11:16

*Comment deleted*  
 **Harry Watson** , 15 December, 11:22

Not that I don’t agree with your sentiment, Harry.  
 **John Watson** , 15 December, 11:24

John, we need to meet up, mate. I’m worried about you.  
 **Bill Murray** , 15 December, 12:11

Thanks, but I don’t need anyone to be worried about me. I’m fine.  
 **John Watson** , 15 December, 12:23

Sorry. You know what I mean. Give us a ring, yeah?  
 **Bill Murray** , 15 December, 12:35

John, you missed your last appointment. This isn’t really what I thought the blog would be for.  
 **E. Thompson** , 15 December, 12:57

how can you have given up on sherlock holmes so easily?  
 **theimprobableone** , 15 December, 14:44

why are you ignoring me?  
 **theimprobableone** , 15 December, 21:06

Because you’re a nutter?  
 **Harry Watson** , 15 December, 21:19

tell me john, why have you given up on sherlock?  
 **theimprobableone** , 15 December, 21:37

Idiot. John thinks Sherlock Holmes is still alive.  
 **A.K.A. Samuel Johnson** , 15 December, 21:44

I saw him die with my own eyes.  
 **John Watson** , 15 December, 21:56

You saw more than that.  
 **A.K.A. Samuel Johnson** , 15 December, 22:00


End file.
